Self-Healing Expressions
manifesting your hearts desire, online life purpose course, life purpose training, melanie votaw, essence, living your passion
Bringing the self to healing, one lesson at a time.
  manifesting your hearts desire, online life purpose course, life purpose training, melanie votaw, essence, living your passion







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The First Year of Grief: Help for the Journey
The First Year of Grief: Help for the Journey.
The bereaved are guided and supported through the grief process in this grief-healing e-course.




A Different Grief:  Coping with Pet Loss
Are You Facing The Loss Of A Beloved Pet?
Explore both the myths and the realities surrounding the experience of pet loss, including why it hurts so much and how it differs from other losses in this Self-Healing Expressions email course.





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Words of comfort for sympathy





Finding Your Way through Grief: A Guide for the First Year by Marty Tousley, RN
Finding Your Way
through Grief:
A Guide for
the First Year







 

Stages of Grief ~ Death and Dying

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The First Year of Grief: Help for the Journey
The First Year of Grief: Help for the Journey

Understand the nature of grief and loss and their potential impact on all aspects of your life: physical, financial, emotional, social and spiritual. Learn how to move through grief actively and make the process of mourning a healing one. Find support and guidance in dealing with the many facets of grief.


Learn More Now! [Audio Message by the author]
   


Dear Marty ~ What are the stages of grief?


Q & A by Bereavement Counselor Marty Tousley

Question: I was wondering if you could list the stages of grief for me as I am trying to help a friend who recently lost her mother.

Answer: How good of you to be the sort of friend who wants to "be there" in a positive way for your friend who is mourning the loss of her mother. You've asked about the so-called stages of grief. What you may be thinking of are the stages of dying originally described by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross in her still popular book, On Death and Dying. Since that book was first published (in 1969), many people have taken her findings much too literally, expecting the dying process to occur in neatly ordered stages, one following the other.

The stages of dying originally described by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross are:
1) Denial and Isolation
2) Anger
3) Depression
4) Bargaining
5) Acceptance

As wonderful as her groundbreaking work in death and dying was, her "stages" model was never meant to apply to those who are in mourning. Her studies were focused on patients who were terminally ill and dying. That is a common mistake you will find repeatedly in the literature still today. But there has been a wealth of research done since Kubler-Ross' pioneering work that focuses specifically on bereavement, loss and grief.

What your friend needs to know is that grief is the normal response to the death of a loved one, and it doesn't happen in neatly ordered "stages" as such.

Most of us who specialize in grief counseling prefer to think of grief as the personal experience of the loss, and mourning as a process (not a single event) that can affect us in every dimension of our lives: physical, emotional, social, spiritual and financial.

Everyone's grief journey is unique, and there is no specific time-frame for it. Although grief is different for each individual, finding a way through it successfully requires some knowledge and understanding of the grief experience and the work of mourning.

Because your friend is engaged in ongoing discussions with you about the death of her mother, you can help her by encouraging her to read what others have written about grief. Arming her with a better understanding of grief prepares her for whatever feelings and experiences she can normally expect, validates her responses, and enables her to face more readily whatever lies ahead. It also offers her the hope that if others have made it through this difficult experience of losing their mothers, then so can she.

Wishing you Peace and Healing,

Marty Tousley, Bereavement Counselor

Copyright © Martha M. Tousley. All rights reserved. If you are interested in publishing this article, please email .


About Marty's Grief Counseling course

This grief counseling course is designed to help the bereaved better understand the nature of grief and its potential impact on all aspects of their life: physical, financial, emotional, social and spiritual. You'll find information, support and guidance on both practical and emotional matters such as:
  • Guidance in making difficult lifestyle adjustments (in finances, retirement, housing, etc.).
  • Dealing with different grieving patterns in a family.
  • Guidance through the emotional upheaval of grief and ways to minimize stress.
  • Guidance through the shock, disbelief, confusion, fear, anger, guilt, sorrow, loneliness of loss.
  • Mystical experiences and spiritual reactions that are commonly experienced in loss.
  • How to identify and establish a support system.
  • How to cope with the upsets, set-backs and aftershocks that accompany normal grief.
Finally, you'll be helped to reflect upon and evaluate your own progress as you move from surviving toward transcending your grief.

Course Outline

Course Length:  24 lessons
Recommended Course Pace:  bi-weekly receipt of lessons

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Marty Tousley is a certified hospice bereavement counselor and the creator and instructor of these:

Grief-healing e-courses including:
The First Year of Grief: Help for the Journey
A Different Grief: Coping with Pet Loss
A Different Grief: Helping You and Your Children with Pet Loss

And these grief-healing e-books (among others):
How To Write a Eulogy: Guidelines & Examples for Paying Tribute...
Life Lines: How to Write an Obituary
Heartfelt Condolence Letters
Helping Another in Grief
Help for Writing Sympathy Thank-You Notes
Grief: Coping with Holidays and Other Celebration Days
© 2004